UFOs in the daily Press:

It's interesting, not humorous

"Sometimes I think we're alone. Sometimes I think we're not. In either case, the thought is staggering."
— R. Buckminster Fuller (1895-1983)

So what are we to make of the whatever it was that was spotted the day after Christmas up by SS. Peter and Paul Catholic Church?

I have a bit of a personal interest in this, because my daughter owns a house just south of the church. So whatever it was, it flew right by her.

My first thought was that it was Ernie, my daughter's beagle. Her dog is capable of great things and considerable mayhem, but he tends to remain on the ground. So I don't think it was Ernie.

I do know, however, that something flew over the near north side of Huntington.

Contained within that previous sentence are three facts:

• Fact 1: No one knows what it is. Therefore, it was unidentified.
• Fact 2: It was up in the air and it was moving. Therefore, it was flying.
• Fact 3: It was something that apparently had some kind of mass. Therefore, it can be called an object.

Connect the dots.

For the record, the three italicized words above did not appear in order in Cindy Klepper's story last Sunday. They may be accurate, but they are also pejorative. As soon as that phrase, or its acronym, are read or spoken, stereotypes come to mind — wide-eyed believers desperate for a peek inside Area 51, good ol' boys of limited sophistication who have been taken up in a flying saucer for a trip around the universe, and images placed in our minds by everything from "The Outer Limits" to "The X Files."

Now that this story is getting out there — you know, the truth is out there — some other members of the media are playing it for laughs.

I'm told it's hit the Bob and Tom nationally syndicated radio show. That's not unexpected — Bob and Tom find humor in the pope.

I was told to watch a particular Fort Wayne TV newscast last night. I didn't write down the exact quote, but the nice lady had a mirthful smile on her face while she said that after the break they'd have a story about a UFO sighting down in Huntington.

The attitude seemed to me to be: Oh, those silly folks in Huntington. What will they think of next?

Let's back up a minute here.

Three employees of the Huntington Police Department saw this thing. They are not (to coin a phrase) freaks, geeks, or weirdos. Two of them are sworn officers; one of them is the ordinance officer who is now a member of City Council. These gentlemen are sober, intelligent, and hard-working. If I have a problem and one of them comes to my aid, I am blessed.

There is at least one other person who has reported seeing what these three guys saw that day. So four sets of eyes saw ... something.

What? I don't know. I'd like to know. Maybe it's just because I'm curious. Maybe it's because members of our police department took a peek and wondered what it was.

That doesn't mean it's all that funny.

Unless you're introducing the story on TV, with a smile.

"We love to cut you down to size." — Don Henley, "Dirty Laundry."

Dave Schultz is associate editor of The Herald-Press.