UFOs in the daily Press:

Last September while I was chasing youngsters about the house to get them scrubbed up for school, the people of Exeter, New Hampshire, were chasing flying saucers and with about the same result.

It seems to me that since our Mariner took the pictures of Mars and our officials said there couldn't possibly be life there, the spotted UFO's have been acting different. They come zipping over cities and towns and villages and they wobble about as if to say "hello", terrifying and puzzling their viewers.

Although most of the viewers who have witnessed the phenomena twice say that while the first viewing filled them with terror, the second merely filled them with awe.

Not only do the UFO's bob up and down and come right towards the viewer, but they openly let down light aluminum-like rods to high tension wires, and they skim over the wires not caring who is watching them getting their supper.

PERHAPS THE most mystifying thing about flying saucers is not their existence, but the fact that government officials are still not acknowledging them to the public.

Sixty people of Exeter saw, at different times, the UFO's as reported by John G. Fuller in "Look" magazine. Not only did they see them, but they took pictures of them, and yet the officials remain silent, or at best allow a few lines to slip out, such as their belief the people of Exeter were victims of mass hysteria.

In talking to several friends, I found that many of them are just as happy over the situation, believing that as long as the officials remain silent it actually means there is nothing there.

HOWEVER what if some evening, as your are standing in your kitchen door, there in your backyard hovers a "flying saucer". As you watch, it beckons to you and with terror you run to the telephone and call the officials.

You: "There's a flying saucer hovering in my backyard, What should I do?"

Official: "Calm yourself my dear Lady. There are no such things as flying saucers. You are the victim of a hallucination."

You: "But it's beckoning to me. It's flashing its lights and its even swiping some of my electricity."

Official: "Impossible"

You: "Now my children are seeing it too. They are screaming with terror, "Oh please won't you come and save us?"

Official: "My dear Lady, once again let me assure you as a government official of your country, there are no FLYING SAUCERS. We have released nothing on that subject, therefore, as you should easily see, you are a victim of hysteria and delusion."

AS HIS CALMING words reach your ears the "thing" reaches out and swallows you, carrying you away in a mighty burst of speed. And even as your family mourn you, the officials will assure them that they are only suffering hysteria and delusion, for if there are no flying saucers, then what swallowed you wasn't even there, and therefore, you aren't really gone. It's all an illusion.